Rejected, Dejected.....And Resurrected !!

A failure surely pricks you; but when it morphs into rejection, it pierces through the mind and you stand testimony to your own annihilation.

These golden words marked in bold might not hold true for anyone ever born on this planet, but I blare them aloud in as superlative a degree as I experienced them. A failure in any other form had always been acceptable to me – It just meant I was not good enough or my efforts towards a goal were not earnest enough. It was always easier to absorb the fact because what I saw in front of my eyes was a direct consequence of my actions. But, being rejected, in my case, meant being marred as “not good enough” by someone else.

I felt nothing less than a pitcher – neatly moulded and crafted by its creator – meant to hold elixir, but instead filled with venom by a spiteful man who deemed it as ‘not worthy of ‘ what it rightfully deserved.

I myself dismiss all these thoughts and assumptions as mere conjectures; I have the strength now. But, poor me! I was a mere weakling then. In one shot, I was uprooted from my earth – the grains of self assurance that held my whole together whenever anything or anyone questioned my abilities, EVER. I disembarked the ship that always sailed on silent waters. I was restless.

The days progressed (as in any other story ;-)) and I slipped into the deeper hollows of dejection. There was no end for I was no heroine of ‘Alice in Wonderland’. But, I am sure now that they do not tell a lie when they say that “Time is the best healer”. It is only with the ticking of the clock that the mystery of what lies ahead unfolds and all the fears that are associated with “what next” are alleviated. Every event that forms the past or the present is nothing but a harbinger of a fast approaching future. It is a simple fact that, again, I managed to learn only with time.

“I am and I shall be what I am meant to be” – the ears resounded with this voice of the inner self, louder than ever. Nothing except the act that I pull out of ‘my present’ will decide what course my life shall take. There is only one thing that shall make the difference – I shall not let my soul be the denizen of a restless self. It deserves peace. I shall not let my lips tilt at an angle that might remind archer of his bow. They deserve smiles. I shall not let my being wilt under the scorching beams of rejection. It deserves the strength of a phoenix – the courage to rise from the ashes.

I cannot deceive myself by assuming that ‘I’ can be defined merely by ‘what I do’. I am more than what I perceive myself to be. And, what dimension ‘I’ shall take – Only TIME will tell.

Learn Thy Lessons.........

She opens her window and stares at the pearls that sparkle in the sky. They are ‘beautiful’ – and she would not call them anything else because there is no other word that can best describe them. The perfect silence is filled up by the rhythm of the breeze that doesn’t make it imperfect in any way. And , not far away are the waves touching the shore, kissing it – gently at times and sometimes passionately.

She is always content looking at the sky, the stars, their crescent companion, the ocean, the waves, the seashells, the sunsets. And for her, this is the epitome of an eternal bliss and it makes her life ‘beautiful’ – and she would not call it anything else because there is no other word that can best describe it.

The consciousness that she wakes up into takes her closer to the peaceful sound of the waves that reverberated in her ears throughout the night. She faces the ocean now – the mighty and the magnanimous. What lies beneath; what lies beyond - The beauty beholds her and the mystery enthralls her. She places her feet forward – there is a surge to explore and she takes a plunge.

The beautiful isn’t just so; it is bold too and she, an amateur swimmer, grapples with it.
It thwarts her moves, picks her up and mercilessly throws her back to the shore. The water splashes across her face; she is forced to retreat. She sits there aghast at what the nature had to offer her.

And in 'the moment' that changes life sometimes, she learns her lessons....

One - the journey forward isn’t always the way you perceive it to be. There are two ways to it – each directly converse to the other. One, from silence to realization of the conscious to the exploration – the path for explorers - the modern world calls it ‘technical’. The other, from exploring the world and all that constitutes it to the realization of the conscious to the perfect silence – The path for dreamers - the modern world calls it ‘philosophical’.
Both might lead to contentment. You only need to be AWARE of the one meant for you; the one that defines your whole. And then nothing can obstruct your path.

Two - Once you are aware, be thoroughly PREPARED; for the lesser prepared are never spared.

And the most important one – the one that is ‘beautiful’ must be termed so because there is no other word that can best describe it :-)

* The irony here is that real life experiences that inspired me to type this post in the ‘latter’ way were purely ‘former’ in nature *

Out (T)here to Beat the Heat !

I shall come later on to what has kept me away from this space always;
For the moment, a cursory insight into what brings me here..........

O Yeah! I am out of the cocoon.

Here, I am not talking about the soft-n-cosy home sweeeeeeeet home. That's the snug little nest this "Never homing pigeon" had left long back with a gleam in the eyes and a moist teeny-weeny something on the right cheek.

And straight into the desert.

And as I set out, I have nothing but …………………………………….

My cutie kitten who knows only love;
A resolve to “beat the heat”;
and MY ONE OASIS.

Believe me, it's all inside.